"Look at you! Look at your legs, Bec! You're so funny..."
Huh? I look down at my legs sticking out from under my skirt.
"What are you talking about?"
"Look at your tanlines! What's with your knees? And your HANDS!"
It's true, I can't deny it - my body is a mish-mash of white, gold and deep brown markings. My recent ocean forays have left me in a colourful state that has created a story across my body, most recently marked in by some irresponsible sunburn acquired during a particularly fun session last weekend...
My legs are dark brown from my knees to my hips, the part of my body that sits out of the water as I wait between waves - the tan stops across the middle of my knee as a marker of how deep my legs are submerged as I sit on my board. There is a band of brown that runs across my lower back showing the spot where my vest sits up over my hips, leaving it exposed to the sun. My hands look like they're swathed in brown gloves from where they stick out from under my sleeves, and I have faint marks on my shoulders and back from the sleeveless vest I sometimes wear. My bikini lines pull up in a halter around my neck and my breasts are creamy white from the little sun time that they manage to enjoy.
But the glowing glory is my arse! It shines like a milky beacon as I pull off my swimmers, beaming out at the world as I (shamelessly) change in the carpark. The clean line of brown running around the top of my thighs shows the recent preference I have for a particular swimmer bottom, indelibly inked in until I change favourites and create new lines.
I think it's funny.
When I get back to the city from weekends at the beach, I catch my colleague looking at my skin to find out how successful my trip was. He's been working hard lately and hasn't been away in weeks.
"You got waves" he accuses me as he looks at the thick white band around my ankle.
I smile at him.
Yes. Yes I did.