When is a compliment not a compliment?

Yesterday I went surfing with my friend, April. She just won a new board in a comp raffle and was excited to try it out. She rang to invite me to come along with her, so we met up in the carpark of a busy local break and I sat and chatted with her as she waxed it up and put in the fins. There was a guy a few cars down from us in a van.

I just asked that chick over there out, but she's got a boyfriend.

He pointed at a bikini-clad woman over by a car on the other side of the carpark, while staring at us and waiting for us to respond.

Oh, right. Um, well, at least you asked. Good for you.

I had no idea who this guy was. Nor why he was talking to us. I looked at April.

Yeah, you didn't have anything to lose!

We went back to our own conversation. But he wasn't done.

Would've been better to wake up tomorrow morning with her in my bed but.

Oh, OK. Ha ha.

It was weird. It's weird having a conversation with a stranger about him trying to pick up girls, while I'm just in my swimmers, sitting in the grass. I walked to the back of my car, and away from the guy...

Although late in the afternoon, the sun still holds its sting so April and I covered ourselves in sunscreen and April used tan coloured zinc on her face, like always - most people around here do. It sits thickly on her face but it means she doesn't get sunburned. After a lengthy discussion on whether I should wear a vest or not while we waited for the suncream to sink in a bit, we went to grab our boards off the grass in front of our cars, ready to get in the water.

As we walked away the guy from before stopped April.

Have fun on that board.

Yeah I will, thanks.

April is the type of person who is kind and polite, and generous with her conversation. I'm not. I walked faster, leaving him behind, still talking. The guy is a creep and I wanted to get away from him. But, again, he wasn't done. He calls out to April.

And even with that clay-face, I'd still do ya!

He actually said that to my friend. And he wasn't even drunk or high. April looked at me, incredulous, and laughed awkwardly. I walked faster, shocked and annoyed but not feeling the need to make a scene - I didn't think April would want me to.

Out in the water, it became an anecdote, something strange and slightly funny to tell our friends and wonder at. But quel dickhead! And what a proposition. Or was it meant to be a compliment? I haven't been able to stop thinking about it and what an arse he is.

And even with that clay-face, I'd still do ya!



  1. Geez - what a prick! So angry you both had to be subjected to that crap!

  2. I think I would've bust out laughing, then said, well, I still wouldn't do you!

  3. Clay face? What's that?

  4. 'Clayface' because of the mask of tan zinc she had on. Funny, huh!

  5. I'm up there on the next plane becco, and I'll f.cken do HIM ... !!

    so help me ... doesn't he know who we are ?

  6. Thanks Pete, that's very kind of you.

    But I have a pretty diverse repetoire of withering looks and cutting remarks, which has so far kept things under control...

  7. face like a half eaten mango ayyyyyy

  8. Yes, I'm married with a son and a male dog. However, a friend once said the following words to me, "Men are stupid." Why is it that men always prove those words to be right?

  9. Haha. Yeah, Surfsister, my friend reckons that too!! She once looked at a guy who was being rude and told him, "You're the reason women say all men are arseholes!"

    But I know some beautiful, thoughtful men that I am proud to have in my life. It's just that the idiots ruin it for everyone else!!

    P.S. Hope your knee's going well?


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