Thinking versus feeling? Worry versus trust?

Sometimes, I get all worky - focused on productivity and achievement - and I sacrifice coastal release and pleasure in pursuit of other goals. I mean, don't get me wrong; work offers pleasures too, and I know that there will always be other times to surf.

The last couple of months it's been easy to put surfing aside; I had such a wave and pleasure-filled summer that I have been able to draw on left over feelings and memories. I've been able to reconcile the amount of fun I had with having to get back to the other parts of my life. But lately the pleasures of my summer have felt lost to me. It's like I have used them up.

More and more I find that when I am away from the sea for too long, I start to forget what it is like to be there. I lose touch with how it feels to surf, and how it is even possible to do that. I lose trust in the strength of my own relationship to the sea and to surfing. When I write that down, it sounds crazy, but it all becomes so intangible and immaterial that I get frightened that it was never real at all. That absence leaves the heart to wander.

When my mind starts down that rabbit hole, the thought of going surfing becomes tinged with concerns and when an opportunity arrives for me to make time, I worry: What if it's crowded? What if there are no waves? What if it's too solid for me to paddle out? What if something comes up and I can't go at all? When you let your mind start down this road, all you can see are the dangers, the negatives, the what ifs...

But rare is the time when I get to the sea and it does not fill me with joy. Rare is the time when I can't enjoy the sensuous pleasures, the energising effects and the overall fun of being in the water. And it is this fun that I try to remind myself of when my thoughts take a turn towards worry.

I think the next time that I let myself lose trust in how I feel about surfing I'll watch this clip and focus on the pleasures and joys that I know I will find in the waves and the sea. Because the waves in this clip look incredible and because Jack Lynch makes surfing look them so fun.

Comments

  1. Fed4:48 PM

    No comments here?
    These are some of the best line that I ever found about surfing!
    Can I please quote you in my blog? I will not be able to say that better and it'll be fake!
    I went through all your links and a lot of other pages, still, there are not many people out there that really write abut surfing and touch the core of it. Or the core of our feelings coming from it.
    F

    ReplyDelete
  2. Rebecca Olive9:09 PM

    Thank you, F. You are very kind. I've felt a bit stuck for words lately, but your comment is very encouraging, so I'll use it to motivate me to write some more,

    I think that often the feelings I find in surfing have less to do with surfing itself, and more to do with all the time I spend out of the water, not surfing! Strange, isn't it. I suppose there is so much more time to reflect and think than when you're in the sea, hungry for waves.

    You can certainly use my words in your blog! I'm touched that you would like to.

    Bec

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Laura Crane has skin in the game: a surf story in five parts*

Image
*The title of this essay is inspired by  Kylie Maslen's recent article about women's sport, 'Skin in the Game '. The essay itself is dedicated to my friends in the Institute of Women's Surfing (Europe), with my thanks for sharing your stories and friendship and resources. I. Oh hey, surf media! Surf media is such an interesting world. I used to consume it voraciously, reading everything I could find - every book, magazine, website, and blog. I was trying to understand it, to understand the world it was describing, to see the patterns and themes as well as the points of difference and resistance. I wasn't out to create a typology or anything like that, but to get my head around what it is that we say to ourselves as writers, editors, photographers and readers. I wanted to know who was talking and who might be reading and to know what was missing from these stories; to find the gaps. It didn't take long for me to turn away from mainstream print magazin...
Read more

I hate Noosa Heads and Surfing*

Image
Today, this image came up on my facebook news feed, and it made me smile. Of course, images on facebook news feeds rarely come with any real contextual information, so I trawled around the net a bit and found some more information... This is an album cover for the ' Warumpi Band ', from the settlement of Papunya in Australia's Northern Territory**. It seems that this image was the cover for an EP of their song 'Jailanguru Pakarnu (Out of Jail)', which was the first ever rock song recorded in an indigenous language. It's a pretty jumping song. It's worth noting that on the Warumpi Band's wikipedia entry , the list of their musical genres includes 'anachro-rock'. *On a personal level, this is absolutely not true. I love Noosa Heads. And surfing! **Update: I had read that the man wearing the t-shirt is singer of the Warumpi Bane, George Burarrawanga. As Dave commented below however, it isn't George. Thanks for your comment, Dave!
Read more

Einstein was a surfer

Image
Um, WHY have I never heard of this song before? Did it do the blog rounds last year when it was released and I wasn't paying attention? Having missed this song, I feel... inadequate. Not that the song is great, but conceptually... AMAZING! And the photo Jimmy Buffet is talking about is real and here it is! And here is a bonus Einstein sporting shorts and a devil may care attitude! Now, LYRICS!! With the obviously winning lines being 'Cause the universe was his home break/And we’re still all paddlin’ out'. **** There’s a photo of a genius Standing by the ocean In a pea coat and cool hat In 1943 On a beach in Santa Barbara He’s looking quite contented His world is only matter And energy Past the Channel Islands Out into the cosmos There are worlds in motion That only he can see He’s smiling as he’s thinking The harbor lights are blinking He’s the smartest cookie Ever was, ever will be Einstein was a surfer ...
Read more